Living With Uncertainty - What Happens Next - 10 Minute Guided Breathing

You're trying to solve a problem that hasn't happened yet. That's what this is. Somewhere at the back of your mind there's a door you can't see behind and you've been standing in front of it all day, rehearsing. What if it goes wrong?

What if they say no? What if the news is bad? And what if I can't cope? And here is the cruel trick of it my friend.

No amount of thinking gets you through the door any faster. Have you ever driven on a long road at night? Your headlight shows you 20 meters of it, maybe 30. And yet you arrive every single time.

You don't need to see the whole road, you only need to see the next bit of it. So today, we're not going to solve uncertainty. We're going to sit down beside it and find out that you can breathe here after all. Hi there, this is Calming Anxiety.

I'm your host Martin, clinical hypnotherapist and former paramedic. And I've spent my working life arriving at people's worst days. So let me tell you something with some confidence before we start. You are far more able than your anxiety says you are.

So get comfy. Lying down is lovely for this one. Headphones if you have them. Because today's breath has a sound to it and it's better when it's close.

And one more thing. If you download my app, Ankit, you can save this session for whenever you need it, wherever you are. And all or not, it's always there. Today's breath is called the humming bee breath.

In yoga, it's called Brahmari, named after the Indian bee because of the sound you're about to make. And here's why I've chosen it for uncertainty. When you hum, two things happen at once. Your out breath becomes long and even, without you having to count a thing.

And the vibration, it travels up through the soft palate, the throat, the bones of the skull, right along the path of the vagus nerve. That vibration is a signal your nervous system finds very difficult to argue with. You cannot hum and brace at the same time. It may feel a little strange the first time.

That's all right. Nobody is listening. So soft lips, teeth slightly apart, jaw loose and heavy. And if it feels right, rest your fingertips lightly over your closed eyes or gently over your ears to close the world out and turn the sound inward.

We'll breathe in through the nose for four and then hum on the out breath. A low, soft hum, nothing musical about it, just steady like this.

All the way out for a count of eight. Good. Let's breathe in in two, three, four, hold and out.

Did you notice where that landed? In the chest, the throat behind the eyes. In two, a little longer if you can, a little lower in through the nose. In two, three, four, pause and out.

Starting at go quieter as it goes all the way to empty. And notice this, my friend. You stopped rehearsing just for a moment there and that's the whole thing we're after. Not answers, just a pause in the rehearsing.

One more in through the nose, filling right down to your belly. In two, three, four and hum all the way out.

Longer than feels natural till your empty. Now let the humming stop and just listen to the silence it leaves behind. That soft ringing quiet, that's your nervous system putting its shoulders down. You can still hum if you wish while I say these words to carry with you throughout the day.

The words that entwine themselves into the fabric of your soul. I can live with uncertainty and I am doing it right now.

My anxiety about the future is not a prediction.

What if thoughts pass through me, they are not me?

I do not need to know what happens next in order to be all right today.

I only need to see the next 20 meters of the road in front.

I release what I cannot control and the weight leaves my shoulders.

I have coped with things I once dreaded and I coped better than I imagine.

I am safe, I am here. There is nothing to fear right now.

There may be picture if you will, the weight that you walked in was not knowing, the weighting, the bracing. Picture it as a heavy bag in your hand and your fingers are opening slowly and the weight is down now. On the floor beside you, you have not thrown it away, you simply stopped carrying it for 10 minutes. To keep this thought, this feeling of balance and care for all that you are, here are your three daily caring tips.

One, when a what if thought arrives today, name it out loud, say that is what if and let it carry on pasty. Two, write down the one part of this situation you can actually influence and do only that today. Three, give your worry a 10 minute appointment this evening and when it turns up early, tell it kindly that it has a time. Now gently, let's come back, wiggle your fingers and toes, take a small stretch wherever you feel you need it.

Take a deep breath in, hold and then relax and release and stretch and when you are ready in your own time, no rush at all, open your eyes and come back into the room. Everything about your situation has changed in these 10 minutes, but you have and that turns out to matter far more than most people expect. If this one helped you, put anchored on your home screen tonight my friend, so that tomorrow, when the what if start, it's one tap away and not a surge. And if there's someone you know who is waiting on news or standing in front of the door, they cannot see behind, send them this episode.

That's how this show found 10 million downloads, not advertising, but people just like you, quietly passing it on. You don't have to see the whole road. Look after yourself, I'll be right here again tomorrow for you. So in everything, in every thought, word and deed, be kind.