Tired But Wired — Why You Can't Switch Off, And How To Calm A Dysregulated Nervous System

You are exhausted, bone tired, and yet the moment your head touches the pillow, your mind lifts off like a bird from a wire. Tired but wired, you can't switch off, there is nothing wrong, nothing you could point to, nothing you could name, and still your body is on the edge for no reason. Nothing braced, waiting for something that never arrives. My friend, this is not weakness, this is not you failing at rest.

This is a dysregulated nervous system, a body that is stuck in fight or flight long, long after any danger has gone. Over the next 10 minutes, we are going to change that together. This is a guided meditation for anxiety, this is nervous system regulation, and it begins right now. Welcome to calming anxiety, I'm Martin Hewlett, and every single day I sit down with you for 10 quiet minutes to help you calm your nervous system and find your way back to yourself.

Before we begin, a small piece of news I've been holding on to. The companion app, Ankit, is coming to market in the next few weeks. Three thousand sessions, searchable by exactly how you feel. Books at bedtime, the night light for the small hours, and so many things that you've written to ask me for.

You'll be able to download your favourite session for offline news so that the session is there already on your phone on a plane on a train in a tunnel at 3 in the morning with no signal at all, no searching, no buffering, just press play. So get comfortable, lying down sitting however you are, let the phone rest, let your shoulders drop away from your ears, let your eyes closed, and let simply begin by noticing. Without changing anything, without fixing anything, the breath you already have.

It's probably higher in your chest than you'd like, a little shallow, a little quick, that's okay, that's information, not failure, so with me, we'll breathe in before we'll hold again for two at the top and then out for six. Ready? Breathe in, two, three, four, hold, relax, two, three, four, five, six, just let that tension just drift as you exhale.

Feel that sensation of release every time you breathe out. Again with me, ready? Breathe in, two, three, four, hold, two, release, two, three, four, five, six, as you breathe out, just picture yourself somewhere relaxing, maybe a holiday destination, maybe your favorite space of calm outside. But as you exhale, see yourself there, relaxed in control, surrounded by an aura of calm. With me, once more, breathe in, two, three, four, hold, two, exhale, two, three, four, five, six, unwind, just feel that sense of release, spreading outwards from your chest, cascading down through every fiber of your beam. This is what it means to regulate your nervous system, not to fight it, not to argue with it. Simply to give it the one signal it has been waiting for all this time to receive that signal beam, it's time now to relax. Within this moment of calm in your day, in the beauty and power of your mind's eye, visualize these words as I say them, taking note of the color, the size of the shape within your own thoughts, and let them settle in your soul. My body is not my enemy, my body has been trying to protect me. I am learning to calm my nervous system, gently, one breath at a time. The alarm may be loud, but there is no fire. I do not have to be stuck in fight or flight, there is a way out and I am walking it. I am allowed to be tired without also being afraid. I have been tired but wired for a long time, tonight I put one of those down. My long, slow exhale is a message, my body is receiving it. I am practicing nervous system regulation and my body is learning to trust the quiet. I do not need a reason to rest, being tired is reason enough. Anxiety relief is not something I have to earn, it is something I am allowed. Now let it all go, the words, the counting, even the breath, let it look after itself. You have already done the work, the window is open my friend, let the fresh air in, let your tension escape.

To keep you in this data balance, here are your three daily caring tips, one, the doorway side. Tomorrow, every time you walk through a doorway, any doorway, take one physiological side, two breaths in, one long breath out, that is all. You go through a dozen doorways a day without thinking and now each one becomes a tiny reset. You are not adding a practice to your life, you are hanging it on something you already do. Two, name the alarm, not the fire. When the dread arrives tomorrow, that lurch, that hum, that on the edge feeling with nothing behind it, just try saying to yourself quietly, this is my alarm, this is not a fire, you are not dismissing the feeling, you are simply refusing to go looking for a fire that isn't there, naming it takes the heat out of it. Three, give the day a landing strip, a plane cannot go from cruising altitude to parked, it needs a runway and so do you.

Ten minutes before bed, just ten, no screen, no scrolling, no news, dim the lights, let your body understand that the day is coming into land. You have spent all day taking off my friend, give yourself somewhere to come down. So gently, bring your awareness back into the space around you, wiggle your fingers and toes, take a breath in, hold, then as you exhale, stretch out the arms and gently open your eyes. If today's session helped, please do share it with someone who is tired but wide and doesn't yet have the words for it. And if you have thirty seconds, a review on Apple Podcast will Spotify genuinely does help another anxious soul find us at two in the morning. That's not a small thing, that's the whole thing. Anchored is coming very soon, with all three thousand sessions downloadable and offline, ready for when you are. The new blog post is up at calminganxiety.org and if you want to go deeper, the anxiety circuit breaker course is also waiting for you at calminganxiety.fm. Until tomorrow in everything my friend, be kind.